OH LUCKY DAY!

A woman is found unresponsive, passed out at a gas station between the pumps. EMS picks her up, no ID to speak of, lethargic, not making sense, wearing a bathing suit, filthy, full of grease. She alternates between being needy and hostile.

A man is found on the streets, c/o knee pain. He says he's a Secret Service agent, and that he's on a mission, which he can't talk about. EMS picks him up and he's hostile and combative throughout the trip.

A woman is found wandering naked in her apartment complex, trying to open someone else's apartment door. She forgot how many pain pills she took for her aching leg, plus she takes enough psych meds to down a small village.

A woman is brought in by EMS and the police. She states she is pregnant and has been assaulted. She says she's been pregnant since January, 2007, that Jason Taylor (Mr. Dancing with the Stars) is her babydaddy, and that the baby's hiding behind her spine, because someone hit her and the baby got scared and went into hiding. There's not a mark on her.

What do all these people have in common? They ended up with ME tonight!

Where do all these lost souls come from? Are they all here in this town? It seems we have a disproportionate amount of these running around, sleeping on the beach, walking our streets. Is it because we're the last spit of land on the continental US before you hit water?

Is it coincidental that they all traipsed in after midnight--on Friday the 13th? It's not even a full moon yet. I can hardly wait.

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYBODY!