LAWS TO LIVE BY IN THE ER

Here's a nod to DR. DINO. This was just too good not to share with the rest of the blogosphere!



First Law: The Art of Medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature takes its course.

Second Law: It is impossible to make an asymptomatic patient feel better.

Third Law: The urgency of the test is inversely proportional to the IQ of the insurance company preauthorization clerk.

Fourth Law: There is no cure for stupid.

Fifth Law: A patient's acceptance of a screening test is inversely proportional to its necessity for that particular patient.

Sixth Law: Trauma survival is inversely related to the patient's value to society.

Seventh Law: Fertility is inversely proportional to intelligence.

Eighth Law: The better the surgeon, the more reluctant s/he is to operate.

Ninth Law:
Part A: It has to be fun.
Part B: If it isn't fun, see Part A.

Tenth Law: "Simple" and "Easy" are not necessarily the same.

Eleventh Law: Poor planning on your part is not an emergency on my part.

Twelfth Law: A bad idea held by many people for a long time is still a bad idea.