Boat Tales

Yesterday I bottom-cleaned my boat. It had been in the water for over a year and needed to come out for servicing and........ugh! cleaning. I couldn't believe what was growing underneath!! Marine life of all colors and shapes! Barnacles! Limpets! Clams! Bearded non-identifiable protoplasm! And of course, it was my job to get it scraped, clean and ready to be stored.

What an adventure! with the help of a high-powered pressure cleaner, a bikini and some Hawaiian Tropic, I set off in 90+ degree weather. Several hours later and with new respect for the stubborn persistence and toughness of barnacles, I was finished and the boat, while not spotless.....had no further discernible sea life clinging to the hull.

"Do something you fear every day." Mission accomplished for the day.

I definitely like being ON the boat not UNDERNEATH it!

When life gives you lemons, make MARGARITAS

Life is never dull in my reality.

Who else would be the wandering pilgrim, with 2 homes, several jobs, my possessions scattered, not knowing where I will be at the end of any given week? I think my existence would drive anyone insane. But, for me, it's normal. I roll with the punches.

Things have been shaken up since the last time i wrote here. I gave up my job here in Paradise. Now I just live here. No more ER for me. I loved it, enjoyed it, and was happy to be a part of the working community here. I worked with an incredible group of nurses, nursing supervisors and allied health personnel which were not only the finest in their field, but a great bunch of people to know personally. It's really too bad that the suits that run the place are a bunch of ASSHOLES. Power-hungry ASSHOLES with personal axes to grind. People not qualified to do their jobs and whose delusions of personal power have made them even more ineffective that they ever knew. They are running the place into the ground while the staff jumps over incredible obstacles every day to give good patient care. I'm taking a temporary hiatus from them, but I WILL BE BACK: there will be REGIME CHANGE soon! The management company that runs the hospitals has their lease expiring in the next few months; therefore, the current administration is out the door and they KNOW it. When they're GONE-I'm IN AGAIN!

(ps I miss my crew--day shift, night shift, the supervisors, Z: Love u guys! keep in touch! See u at Publix!)

So now I work in Miami. Not a bad gig, since it occupies my time and gives me something to work towards: going HOME!
I do my work time, and count down the days until I get out of work, pick up the dog and head SOUTH on the Overseas Highway while the ocean welcomes me home. It's a beautiful thing. Plus the hospital in Miami is by the ocean, so having lunch seaside gives me a chance to not get too homesick.

It's now full swing into summer. The heat is oppressive, tolerable only when you're submerged in a body of water. We're also gearing up for hurricane season and the probability the oil spill might be coming our way. What a freaking disaster that's going to be for this beautiful part of the world and all the marine life. Maybe even the end of things as we know them. How very sad for all......

TeenQueen was here for a week on vacation. Incredible change in her. Poised, mature, confident, happy. Somehow my snarky teen was taken and someone replaced her with an incredible young lady! She looked so radiant, so international......and my goodness, speaking SPANISH like a native! I am so VERY PROUD OF HER!!! All things happen for a reason and this was the best Mother's Day present I could possibly get!

Happy? As happy as I'm going to get today. Do I live a crazy life? Sure I do. And I get to keep two residences clean in the process, have groceries in both, make sure you pick up mail at both places. Would that drive anyone nuts? Only if you need to know where your toothbrush is at all times. You either have 2 of them, or you buy one when u get there.

You don't sweat the small stuff. You roll with the punches.

And then you're back in Paradise again.........

Let's hear it for the NIGHT SHIFT!!

I can't help it. Call it circadian rhythms, call it comfy, call it inconvenient to everyone else in my life: I LOVE THE NIGHT SHIFT!!
Always have, always will. No matter that I sleep all day, will probably develop health problems and will live 7 years less according to all the studies. The night shift offers soooo many good things that I have to keep on going back for more. And the night shift in the Keys is nothing but a funshift! Good people working, less traffic, NO SUITS (if you get my drift) and a laid-back atmosphere. Not that it's any less acute at times (you fly people out, you code people, and BOY do you get your share of drunks and psychos!) but it just seems less like work and more like FUN in the wee hours.

When I was married, my husband hated me working nights. Hated to sleep without me, so apparently he slept with several others to teach me a lesson. Sorry, I was absent in class that day. I don't particularly like anyone telling me how and when I can toil at my profession. So when he went on his merry way, and when the TeenQueen was safely ensconced in a faraway land under lock and key, I decided to give it a try once again.

And I'm not sorry.

So I've been happily toiling away from 6pm to 6am, doing tons of overtime because we're so short of personnel (honestly, doesn't someone want to come play with us?) and enjoying every minute of it.

The tourist season is almost over. We've seen the traffic die down after Easter. Still some spring breakers hanging around, but the snowbirds are beginning to fly north again. The weather is beautiful, the water is warming up and the boat is ready to go. We took it out last week and had a wonderful time, so much so that we ran out of gas before getting into our canal. My tan is back, I'm back on the bridge and life has resumed its lazy, sunny direction. I'm happy to be back in Paradise.

The TeenQueen is doing well, in school, making TONS of friends, wearing a uniform and looking incredibly pretty and grown up. I miss her to death, but I make the sacrifice of not having her near knowing she is well and doing well. I love her dearly and the separation has not been easy for me, but maybe she'll thank me one day for having the foresight to change the direction of her life when she was unable or unwilling to do so. She'll be back for a few weeks in the summer and again, we plan to head to Daytona Beach for a week of sun and fun.

And the irrepressible, atomic HB? He landed a job heading up marketing at a local home health agency, so guess who lives in Paradise now? The big house in Miami sits empty again, apart from my weekly trips to work at Mercy Hospital, where I work in PACU. He's now wearing linen pants and short-sleeved tropical shirts to work and thinking about trading in the Porsche for a convertible. How's that for instant adjustment?

I'm home. And so happy to be here. As the TeenQueen would say, "Your fantasy, my reality."

oops.........forgot I promised.......sorry!

With all the fracas going on, I forgot I did promise to post some FantasyFest pictures. Well, better late than never......

We did have a wonderful time that weekend. HB and myself, our friends V. and Dr. S. who did join us for some hours of fun before he turned into a pumpkin at midnight (he had to work in the early AM). We stayed at a beautiful little hotel right on the southern beachfront of Key West called the LaMer and Dewey House, which was a class act all around. We ate and drank and made merry all weekend in good company, reveled with the revelers and managed to stay out of too much trouble!

Even the TeenQueen had fun, she met up with her friends there, took some great pictures.

I leave you with some of the pictures

LOBSTER TAILS

THEY WERE TORMENTING THE DOG......

BEFORE THE CHEF CORRALLED THEM INTO SUBMISSION.

BEFORE THEY WERE LIKE THIS.......

October Begins

It is October. My favorite month of the year. The month that the weather gets divine down here in the Keys. The month TeenQueen and I celebrate another year above ground. Halloween. FantasyFest. The holidays around the corner. All good things. And hopefully, work starts picking up too, because we're hurting around here.

Celebrated my birthday weekend with a little side trip to Miami for some shopping with the TeenQueen. In the end I didn't buy much because, although I WANT, I didn't really NEED much of anything. Decided at 4PM on a Saturday afternoon while sitting in crazy traffic in South Miami that I had had ENOUGH!!! of Miami---so much for that---and picked up my stuff and headed home. Ended up celebrating on Sunday at LaTeDa's excellent brunch in Key West and practically had the whole place to myself! I had been planning to do a sunset cruise later that afternoon, but a little too much champagne during brunch killed that idea.....didn't last that long into the day! But it was a great time, with good company and food, and that's all that matters. The weekend was memorable, all were well-behaved, and things have a way of straightening out if you don't drag them around too much.

Back to work tomorrow. Everyone packed away and home where they belong. Next week my services have been requested by PACU to cover a co-worker's vacation. So a little change of pace is in store. Five days, plus an ER day. A little extra work comes in handy.

Things are quiet and peaceful. Just the way I like them. Let's see how long that lasts! HB and I have entered a period of detente regarding life in general. He's accepted my decision to stay here. He's not pushing. He realizes I need space to breathe. That doesn't mean he doesn't wish I'll change my mind. But it is what IT IS. And even he admits he's miserable in Miami. He breathes like a free man when he's here, away from work and his problems. Such a complicated man right now! But his complications don't taint me because I don't let them taint me. I'm here to lend an ear, a hand, but not to assume responsibility for things that I don't own. And the economic reality is always there....I have work HERE. Work there is scarce right now. And if the traffic situation this weekend is any indicator of my mood, I'm going to be pretty grumpy and unliveable with.....and we both know it!

Stone crab season is coming up. Life is beautiful. Just a series of sunrises and sunsets and the fun you have in-between!

WRITTEN IN CONCRETE.....at least for today!

PS........................

For all of those who are wondering......

The MOJO stays in PARADISE!!!

Higher order: PARADISE
Lower order: HB

So low in the pecking order that I can't even see him......oh well.....(ps.----your stuff is packed).

As I like to say: LIVING WELL IS THE BEST REVENGE!!

Not Mentally Healthy......

We've had three crazy days in the ER this week. All beds full. Some beds full of fruitcakes. Sick people. Sick-in-the-head people. People you had to hustle to fly out to Miami before things got ugly. People who wouldn't accept that they were sick, dying, on death's door, but were too BUSY to get treated.

My favorite was the phantom pregnancy. Yes I was pregnant. Yes, I dropped it in the toilet. And flushed. Negative HCG. Negative ultrasound. No bleeding. No physical signs of pregnancy. Yes, this happens to me all the time. Next time, I'll fish it out of the toilet and PROVE to you all I am pregnant. All delivered with that wonderfully flat, blank affect. Lovely. Pregnant women, hold on to your bellies....there's been a lot of home-made C-sections reported lately by women who want babies....your babies!

Then we come to the litigious TIA person, who drinks and smokes crack cocaine, but blames a pill given to him in prison for his TIA's. The jail you spent a month in for.....breaking and entering, possession of *WOW* crack cocaine! There's a conspiracy theory everywhere. He signed papers under false pretenses. Everyone's out to get him. He has things to do at home.....I don't have time to be Baker-Acted! Yes, sir you do. And the police escort at your bedside will cool your heels until you are transferred.

Another lovely contestant happened to swallow a bag of cocaine while being searched. Then refused permission to have the surgeon extract it, saying he would rather die than go to jail, because you know what they do to good-looking boys in jail. Hate to break it to you sweetheart, you're not all that lovely to look at. And even the repeated explanations of a slow painful death by cocaine bag rupture didn't sway you. In a move against the clock, we had to call a judge on a Sunday afternoon and interrupt his daiquiris to get a court order to RUSH you to surgery and save your life. And we still got called every name in the book by you, sweet child. You ARE clueless. You play, you pay!

Lovely lovely patients. Of course they are not all like that. I had a little old guy latch on to my upper arm and attempt to bite me while in the middle of a rectal exam. No dentures, fortunately.....he just gummed me a little. I had to laugh, then he laughed too when I asked him if I tasted good! Such a cutie....love patients like that!

Everyone gets the happy treatment in our ER. Just be NICE to us......we are LOADS of fun! Flirt with us, we will flirt back! Send us flowers (some patients do!) Send us chocolate and we'll love you forever. Buy us lunch and we'll flash you. You get as good as you give.

And after the long shift is over, and you're sitting in the pool having a cocktail...you know that you got your brownie points in for Heaven today. You didn't kill anyone, you tried to do your best, you probably entertained some, irritated others.... and that is the nature of the profession.

Happy weekend from Paradise!!!

xoxoxo

Mojitogirl

SUAVECITO.....

That's me in Havana. On the other side of the water.



Four days off. Six days on. Eight days off. Essentially the flow of my life these days.

Days working mean 12 hour days in a non-busy ER. Get up early, then get home, eat, shower, go to bed and do it all again the next day, occasionally interrupted by a swim, a walk on the bridge, dinner with friends, an on-the-run martini at the Hurricane.
Hug the TeenQueen, cuddle with the dog, then into bed. Try to entertain myself in the ER during the day, but boy, if it's SLOW, the day drags.....sometimes we're actually all jumping on any patient that walks through the door.

Days off, however, are a study in tropical living. Beach time, pool time, tan time, boat time, lobster time, cooking for friends time. Even a little down time in Miami if the call schedule permits. HB time, if he happens to come into town for a few days (and is on his BEST behavior, which usually happens after a few days away from me). The off-days haven't even been interrupted lately with extra shifts because everyone is SLOW and there's no extra work to be found. Bad on the wallet. Good on the soul.

I just realized today that we are at peak hurricane season and there has been hardly a stir. No constant Weather Channel watching like last year, where every other weekend we were making evacuation plans. This year, if we have a passing shower in the afternoon, we're amazed. The days have been beautiful, and you can already tell the change in the season: the days are shorter, the sun sets earlier, the breeze is balmy, less oppressive. One more month before the A/C comes off and the windows open until May....and the electrical bill goes down significantly.

FantasyFest is around the corner, coming up next month. I think this will be the year I bypass the ER and actually GO downtown to see what the hoopla is all about. I'm trying to get a group together from out of town, since I don't really want to dress up/body paint/raise hell/get smashed, just go and mingle. I mean I love a good costume party as much as the next person, but the idea of public nudity, drunken idiocy and vomiting in someone's front yard is not really my idea of a good time. Call me old-fashioned....

I'm so happy here. Life might not always be stress-free, but my surroundings kind of melt everything away. I think I'd rather struggle a little here to make it than be in the lap of luxury somewhere else. It's not all about being happy. It's about being at peace with myself. With my life, how I live it. That I find joy in the little things, not the stuff I buy. Can't buy a sunset. Can't buy a manatee. Can't buy an ocean breeze.

But I can buy an expresso martini after my bridge walk!

Maybe I should change the nickname to MartiniGirl---naaaa! I've been Mojitogirl for way too long! And anyway, I only drink mojitos these days when I'm in Havana, sitting at the outdoor restaurant opposite the cathedral in the colonial part of the city. That's a tradition I intend to keep as long as I can hold a glass up to toast with. Mojitos in Havana. Anything else-everywhere else!

Bittersweet in Paradise

I love the Keys. Other than Daytona Beach, where I lived previously, this is a place where I feel comfortable, like in my own skin. The relative ease of living here is palpable. Things FLOW here for me. I do my thing and no one bothers me. I walk the dog at 1AM down a dark street with a Q-beam so I wont lose her (she's a black MinPin, very EASY to lose, especially if there's a cat in the area) and I don't give it a second thought. I cruise in and out of places without fear. I drive like the locals, slowly, lumbering around in no particular hurry. I know the cops, the clerks at the market and drugstore, know my neighbors. I work in a little hospital where I can float effortlessly through any department without stress.

Lately I have been overcome with a sense of urgency, as if Paradise is coming to an end for me. I know why. It's because Paradise is not infinite. My time here is coming to an end. I just don't know when.

Why leave Paradise? Because if I stay here, I will become complacent. I won't be able to rejoin civilization again. I won't be able to work at a REAL hospital again, because it would be too stressful. Because I really have to go back to school and get an advanced nursing degree. I can't do this 12 hour shift thing forever. In a couple of years my knees and hips will be shot and I won't be able to run around like I used to. Couple that with a TeenQueen who just gets more expensive year after year, college, car, insurance looming before us like the 800 pound elephant in the room. Financially, it's just getting more difficult to live comfortably here, and while I can work 4 to 5 days a week and make extra money, I can't continue to do this forever. I've tried downsizing, cutting here and there, but it's just getting harder and harder.

Plus, we have the HB factor. Which I don't want to get into, but the crux of it is: He's got a business to run. And he can't run it from here.

The thought of leaving Paradise makes me extremely melancholic. All I ever have to do if I'm feeling down is go outside and see the ocean, feel the breeze, walk the bridge. Go sit in the boat even if it's parked at the dock. Just the fact that I wander around town in shorts, bikini top and flip-flops and no one gives me a second look is sooooo soothing to the brain. I never wanted to go back to wearing full make-up to go get the mail in the mailbox, to high heels and panty hose, to the latest handbag craze, to name-dropping. I hated it then. I hate it more even now.

I have a favorite saying: "Don't spend money you don't have on things you don't need to impress people you don't know and who don't give a damn anyway." This is the antithesis of living in Miami, where you DO spend money on things you DON'T need to impress people-period. To me this is nauseating to the core. It goes against everything I believe in. I don't want to be anywhere near this, much less sucked into this atmosphere. Yet this is what I'm contemplating.

I don't even want to think about the traffic, the road rage, the rude people, all squished together into a huge city.

I love the Keys. I love that I can walk into Tranquility Bay, swim in the pool and no one blinks. I love that I can go to Bahia Honda, sit under a palm tree and have a beautiful scene laid out in front of me-and have it all to myself. I love the fact that I have what I need here, and I don't need much anymore. I've downsized and downsized and still feel the need to DOWNSIZE much more! But I can't retire on the sailboat if I don't go back to school, then make the money to buy the sailboat ( oh, yes....and take sailing lessons so I can take it out of the dock!)

If I go, I'm going to miss this place. The ease of being ME here. My little ER, my crew, my friends. My sunsets over the water. My tan. My docs, who are a fun bunch of bananas, each and every one of them. The Keys gave me license to be ME-water sprite, ocean wench, happy and tattooed. The Keys gave me joy among all the calamitous things that happened to me here-marriage break-up, Thanksgiving in jail, financial set-backs, TeenQueen trouble. I probably would have gone nuts anywhere else. Here, you knew that the sun would set in all its glory and be back to offer you a new glorious sunrise the next day.

Sometimes you have to give up something of a lower order to achieve something of a higher order. Problem is, I don't know which is the "lower order" variable. Is it the Keys? Is it HB?

Decisions, decisions!

Anyway, I live every day like it's my last. I tell the people I care about that I love them, I'm good to my patients and my coworkers, I enjoy every sunset, I cuddle with the dog and cat. And I pray for clarity and serenity and the ability to make a sound decision without the subsequent need to be medicated on anti-depressants. God may close some doors, but he always leaves a window open. I just have to feel the seabreeze somehow.

Unlikely Fishing Buddies.

The TeenQueen is a funny character of sorts. She's independent, smart beyond her years and in possession of her own STRONG opinions. She's also rebellious, somewhat of a procrastinator and never lets an opportunity slip by to tell it like it is. She's also a possessive, slightly jealous soul. When she first met HB, her opening line was "Oh, you must be the ass*****ole boyfriend." No shame. Whatsoever.

My, how things change in a short time.

The TeenQueen and HB went fishing yesterday. I don't go fishing with him because I can't do anything right enough for him, from casting a line to driving my own boat to having the right equipment on the boat. He yells, I get mad, I sulk, but we're stuck together and can't get away. He yells and carries on if the fish get away. He yells and carries on if a barracuda takes his fish. He's LOUD.....and usually in an inoffensive sort of way, but I don't like people who yell. I avoid them at all costs. Little childhood trauma of mine, but hey, I deal with it.

So, whatever possessed my worldly, "I can't be bothered to talk to adults because I'm the Supreme Center of the Universe" child to go fishing with him while I working is BEYOND my comprehension. But out fishing they went, side by side, on the boat for hours, catching fish after fish which they brought home. Who knew?

HB pronounced the TeenQueen a consummate fishing pro. He praised her single-minded devotion and concentration to the task at hand. He liked the fact that she knew good fishing spots and she helped bring in the boat to dock without prompting. He liked that she handled her own bait. He was impressed.

I was impressed that he was impressed.

Afterwords, I asked her how it went out there. She said she had fun. I also asked if he had yelled at her. She replied coolly, "He yelled. I yelled back at him. You know I'm a bitch, Mom and I don't take crap from anybody."

The sight of them sorting through the lobsters, with her explaining how to clean them, how to identify males from females, and scolding HB because one of the lobsters was too small almost brought me to tears.

My little girl is growing up!

The Q WORD

Finally getting some downtime in the ER. After a whirlwind of activity in there since before mini-lobster season, it has finally toned down ( and NO-the Q-WORD will not be used!) to where we're actually cruising through the day without much hoopla. It's been nice to the point that you can actually go out and pick up lunch, then come back and eat. That all 6 rooms aren't full at the same time, that stupid stuff isn't coming through the door every two minutes. We need a break before high season begins again.

The same goes for the town. Everybody's talking about the next two DEAD months. I've actually been out and about in town and the place is pretty empty except for the locals. The other day I had the pool at Tranquility Bay practically to myself. Which wasn't bad, since I was not in the greatest of moods and I just needed a quiet place to think, carry on conversations in my head and try not to scream in frustration at things that weren't going well. Even that has passed, and now I'm in full JOY mode again, doing the things I love to do without interruption or prior commitments. Even work is fun again when you don't have to rush home to SERVE the NEEDY....

I took a walk last night on the old Seven Mile Bridge while the sun went down and the moon came up over the water. I usually do morning walks before it gets too hot, but yesterday I missed my morning window of opportunity and decided to do it at night. As I stood on the bridge at dusk, listening to my IPOD, I couldn't help looking around at the beauty of the place, where I was standing, over the water, under the moon. I had to thank God out LOUD for the opportunity to be here. For the chance to savor this beauty before me. For the moment that I was living HERE. NOW. Even though I might not be here tomorrow, I was here today and I experienced ocean, sky, moon, sunset and profound JOY. And no matter how dire any situation was, I would be OK. And I am.


For those of you interested in the fishing report, snapper and swordfish are running in droves. Lobster is EVERYWHERE. If you can fish, you don't need to buy your source of protein. The weather is great, the hurricanes have for the most part stayed away, and the seas are calm. It's still hot, but we're crawling towards October already. Next weekend is Labor Day, and I'm OFF for 8 days. I'm having friends come into town and there will be a lot of fish tales to be made!

In the meantime, I swim in the afternoon at Tranquility Bay, walk the bridge, go to the beach, keep up with my friends, keep the TeenQueen on task, and plan my winter jaunt to Macchu Picchu. And work to pay the bills. Ok, it's not all fun.

Have a great weekend, wherever you may find yourselves


XOXOXO from PARADISE.

Oh, those pesky BUGS!!!

HB is on a personal mission. He wants lobsters. He wants them NOW! And he's vexed because the lobsters he wants are living under the dock where my boat is parked. They live there, and you're really not supposed to harvest them unless you're a certain distance from shore. But they are (supposedly) easy pickings for anyone. Except HB.

He's tried and tried and TRIED to get at them. And they foil him at every turn. Every chance he gets, he goes over to the dock and peers underneath to see where they are. If the water is clear, he scopes out the whole underside of the dock, several hundred feet of it. Like a policeman doing a head count. And then he broods and plans how to bring them up. Never mind that the canal is rocky, probably full of bull sharks, which are notoriously aggressive, and other unkindly predators. He's already fallen off the dock once and scratched himself to hell. He's lucky that he didn't dislocate or break anything.

But it has become his own personal crusade.

Lobsters for lunch. Lobsters for dinner. Catching the wretched beasts. He's obsessed.

I don't understand. If you want them THAT much, go buy them. The prices are incredibly low this season.

Every hunter has his prey. And he's being bested by a brainless crustacean.

You can't pay for this kind of entertainment!!!

It's Jim Cantore Time!!!

It's a rainy day in Paradise.

So much for the weekend. Hurricane season is in full swing and our first taste of it is coming down in buckets in the form of Tropical Storm Ana. It's gray, overcast and pouring rain. So much for jaunting over to Key West, sitting by the pool and generally having a merry old time this weekend. I knew the boating situation was shot, since we have a small craft advisory all weekend. But hell, I don't want to be stuck INDOORS all weekend! Even if HB is home! I've got a killer work week coming up and I need RAYS!

We finally caught some lobsters the other day. And some great fish. We've been feeding our friends tasty ceviche, fish chowder and other concoctions. I even turned down fish last night.....for the first time in my life. No thanks, I think I'll have french toast for dinner. I'm all fished out!

The ER has been slow but steady. Lots of lacerations and pustulent abscesses lately. No more middle of the night bowel resections either, thank goodness. That's getting old real quick. The cool thing about my job is that I can pretty much do anything ANYWHERE in the clinical areas, so people pull me for emergencies, and that breaks up the monotony of the day. Yesterday I got pulled to the OR because one of the nurses was running a little late coming in for a call-back. So I got the patient into the surgical area, prepped him, did his paperwork, got him into the OR and was back in the ED in time to give report and get OUT! I like doing that sometimes. Key West keeps calling for shifts too, and I can't afford to turn them down at this time. Money is getting a little tight in Paradise, and we still have at least 3 months of slow season before we pick up again.

On a cool note, had a pretty gruesome propeller accident the other day. Almost total degloving of a leg, It looked like something out of a Terminator movie, when Arnold takes his skin off and you can see the titanium endoskeleton underneath. Lots of bare tendons, tib-fib and a pulsating pedal pulse like a little water balloon. Patient was driven from the boat to the dock to the ED, so TraumaStar wasn't called until he got to us, but we still managed to get the patient choppered out in 45 minutes. Very cool! It was an impressive wound, and I heard from the chopper crew that even the staff at the trauma center were impressed with the wound when they saw it. Patient did OK, too. So glad!

I've had a really good offer from HB, my knight in shining armor. He owns a beautiful home in Miami, two hours away. He's offered to move me up there, no expenses, just work and make money. I have lots of agency work up there, probably more work than here. The TeenQUeen's schooling wouldn't be an issue, since she's now homeschooling via computer. There's just one sticking point: I HATE MIAMI!! I would have to leave my beloved Keys. Not be near the ocean. I'm not starving yet. I appreciate the fact that he wants us together and that he spends lots of time here, but he also needs a home base. His house is empty most of the time when he's here. And eventually the travel is going to get to him, even though he LOVES it here. He practically grew up here and has fished and dived most of the upper Keys.

Dilemma. I have a cushy job. It's expensive to live here. I love the Keys. I hate traffic. I HATE MIAMI.

I'll keep working reaallll hard!! I am ocean. I'd be miserable in Miami. This is where I want to be. Even with the prospect of a beautiful home and being a kept woman, I still balk. I guess anyone else would be jumping at the opportunity. But I'd rather be poor (or semi-poor!) and independent in a place where I love than be well-kept and happy (?) in a place I hate.

Oh, well. It's raining outside. Time for some indoor sports!

AT A SNAIL'S PACE

Ah, the ER in off-season. It is a joy to be there. Empty rooms, quiet hallways. The occasional stir of a drunk or drug seeker. Sunburns as medical emergencies. Quietly punctuated by the patient who comes in for "cold symptoms" and is in full florid CHF.

I tell you, they just walk in and say "I have a cold. I can't sleep at night because I can't breathe." Never mind that they smoke 2 packs a day, or that they haven't seen a doctor in YEARS or that they're coughing up black goop from their lungs. But the fun starts when you start a nebulizer treatment and their heart rate shoots up into the 180's, put them on the monitor and it's A-FIB, and suddenly they're huffing and puffing. Start the Cardizem, etc, etc. No cardiologist on call? It's time to FLY!!

Or when they sign in and say "I've got a terrible headache." Ok, let's give you some drugs, check out the CT. An hour later, the headache is still there, but now you're complaining of chest pain, midsternal, radiating to the left arm, suddenly relieved by 2 Nitro sublingual. Where the hell did THAT come from? Oh, and he forgets to mention the old meningioma on that side of the head that was gamma-knifed several years back. Yeah, we kind of picked up that one on the MRI. Whoops! forgot to tell us about it, huh?

So one patient flies to Miami. One patient gets admitted. And the sunburn with the horrible itching goes home and is warned, under penalty of DEATH, not to go out in the sun again for the rest of his vacation stay here. Surrrre.......

I wonder if I could get the nail technician to do a house-call (work-call?). Maybe I could get a manicure/pedicure between patients. Or pick up my dry-cleaning, or do grocery shopping. Twelve hours of this laid-back pace could kill.

I miss the juicy traumas. I need to wrestle a drunk or something. One shift in Key West should resolve the old ennui.

Scratch that, I might break a nail.

A Serious Case of Bed-Head

I'm having a bad hair day. And a bad headache/sore throat/body aches/can't sleep day. I called in sick to work because, with a 5:15AM wake-up time, I was still up at 4:00AM trying to get comfortable and fall asleep. Not to mention, a million goofy thoughts pounding inside my head. I'm not particularly stressed or overworked, just unnaturally anxious over things I have control over. Funny how your mind trips you up sometime.

So I'm home, trying to get some sleep. As you can tell, I'm not succeeding. I finally decided not to leave the bedroom because I have a compulsion to tidy up and clean anything out of place that I see. Disregard the fact that I, the Clorox Queen, scrubbed this house top to bottom yesterday, so there's really nothing to do, except notice the little lint specks on the carpet, or a water spot on the kitchen counter. Yup. Obsessing again.

I wish I could focus on other things. I tried classical music, since I spent the wee hours downloading all this music. Nice, but no-go. Reading only makes my headache worse. I'm not hungry. I don't have any projects pending-I did them ALL!! I can't go outside because it's really hot and muggy. I won't clean the TeenQueen's room because that's HER JOB....and her mobility this weekend depends on her finishing the task.

Still trying to get some sleep. Bathed the dog, cleaned the kitty litter, approved the TeenQueen's cleanup of the toxic bedroom. Head is still throbbing. Downed some more Advil. I should have gone to work. At least I would have been busy AND paid for it! Still not hungry. I'm surviving on breakfast cereal and water.

We're expecting thunderstorms this weekend in the Keys. The official start of hurricane season is almost upon us *GROAN*
It's hot hot HOT!!!

I think I feel a nap coming on........Happy Friday from Paradise!!!

PS....

Yeah......give your kid a hug. And try not to strangle her in the process.

The TeenQueen is grounded for the holiday weekend. Seems that she took it upon herself to have a driving lesson. In my new pick-up truck. With my spare key. While I was at work. Without asking for permission. On the eve of a very busy holiday weekend when the Overseas Highway is teeming with tourists, boat trailers and happy-hour revelers. And of course, HOW did I get the bad news? Papi, whose sole purpose in life is to pass me in the halls and turn his face in order not to acknowledge my existence on this planet, happened to CALL ME with the news. A prophet of gloom and doom. Thanks.

Yes, the TeenQueen's all right. No scratches on her or the car. Even managed to park it nicely in the driveway. But she's grounded for the weekend. Nobody in, nobody out. And attempting to make my life miserable in the process. Nice try, kid. Ain't gonna work!

I'll take the boat out Tuesday--BY MYSELF--when she's back in school and the tourists leave. I'll have the sandbar to myself.

This too shall pass. My mood's too good to let ANYTHING bring it down! It's a beautiful day and I'm walking on air! The world is my oyster. And Bubbles and I have a date at the old Seven Mile Bridge at sunset!!

HUG YOUR KID

It was a beautiful day in the Keys today. After days of cloud cover and stormy weather, the sun came up this morning, the winds died down and the scenery became postcard-perfect for my drive down to Key West in the morning. Unfortunately, I wasn't going to work. I was going to a memorial service for a colleague's young son. And even the dazzling beauty of the sky, sun and blue water everywhere wasn't enough to lift my spirits from the terrible sadness.

It's every mother's nightmare, outliving their children. As a parent you hope and pray it never happens to you because: HOW DO YOU DEAL? How do you wake up every morning with that terrible aching void knowing your child is gone and you're still here? And while we can empathize and console others with such a terrible loss, in the back of your mind you always know: This could have been ME. This could have been MY CHILD. After all, we're all one breath away from dying. I can accept that. I see it daily at work. People that are dying, about to die, close to dying, but not quite. You expect older people to die. I can handle that. You see younger people die and it shakes you for a while. Someone close to you dies and it rattles your foundation, especially if it was unexpected. But to have to bury your child---I believe there is no greater pain, no greater loss, no greater agony.

I'm sad. I'm sad for my friend's loss. I'm sad that it made me think again of possibly being in this terrible position someday. It made me realize there are no guarantees in life, that you must live fully every day as if it was your last happy day on Earth. Because when so much is at stake, that day may come sooner than later.

Go hug your kid. Tell them you love them. Make sure they know.

EVERY DAY IS AN ADVENTURE

Every day is an adventure, an open book, a feast, a buffet table ready to be piled up high on your plate. No matter how crappy the day may start, there is always the opportunity that it might get BETTER! If you live believing this, you deliver this fate upon yourself. Live, love, laugh. Seize the moment. Enjoy the sunset. I certainly did today!

A wise man once told me that what doesn't kill you eventually makes you stronger. I had the chance to repay the favor today. I hope it helped.

Happy Friday everyone!! XOXOXO from the Florida Keys!

PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME GO THERE!

My oh MY! I hate leaving the Keys! I don't care that civilization, shopping, and metropolitan life are only 100 miles away. It gives me profound sadness to travel north on the Overseas Highway, enjoying the view of the ocean while going over bridges and islands knowing that I'm headed to the messy, rude, traffic-crazy place called Miami. It drives me nuts to know I have to be in a state of permanent stress while I drive, park, sit in endless traffic. I HATE MIAMI!! I HATE GOING THERE!! And not even the prospect of good things--friends, shopping, Peruvian food, Ikea---can make me feel differently. Funny, I never felt that way about Daytona Beach...I LOVED living there, knowing that it was calm, polite and soothing to the eyes. Miami is just a clusterfuck full of cars, loud people and road rage-namely mine. So my friends, please! Come and SEE ME HERE!! Don't make me go up there!

But I'm back and planning my next little venture out into the deep blue sea. The weather is perfect for boating. And I'm starting to look pale by Keys standards. And the weekend is upon us. I have an ICU shift in Key West tomorrow, and then.....freedom!!

So I'll be headed for Bahia Honda State Park, navigate the boat under the old bridge and park it in a blue hole somewhere. And let the day flow and ebb......